JexXi
About
Age: 36
Sex: Female
Sexuality: Omnisexual
Relationship: Committed
Occupation: ...Business Woman by Day...
Location: Baltimorgue, MD. USA
Facebook: View
Friends
24
Crushes
6
Membership

My Biography

"I LOVE YOU BUDDY YOUR LOVE IS LIKE THE BEST DEFENSE IN THE WORLD."
♥ ♥ ♥ I LOVE YOU KRIS ♥ ♥ ♥


LOA: I just acid rated you an 11.
Me: haha, is that possible?
LOA: yes, I rate in inches. :-P



Hola, My name is Jexxi, I'm 21 i like music, Angelina Jolie, Colin, Stanley Kubrick, Ed Furlong, Johnny Depp, Dax Riggs, laughing, testicle weights, anal beads, I also like circle jerkin with my Neenee, and donkey punchin MER at the same time. I enjoy such arousing activities such as hand starting Bran's one eyed yogurt thrower, parking my beef bus in Misha's chocolate town, racing my 1992 Dodge Sandsnake with the gas cap equipped with Bob Barker's signature. Nope, I'm not mexican, latina, chicana, puerto rican...if you can guess my race I'll buy you a car :D


Sinch: i rembember the first time jessica and i made love....we were moaning like two gays on a brunch cruse in the carabian

regicidenow: even if it does it gets pushed out by my little seaman
jexual_chocolate: i didn't realize the navy was involved?

"arguing with me is like racing in the special olympics...even if you win, you're still retarded" --My Dad

RegicideNow: jexxeh isa perfect example of why not to do drugs
Me: cam is a perfect reason on why cousins shouldn't procreate



<333 my Cid BABAY

To: JexXi
From: cidbaby666 (19F)
[Add Block] [Add To Address Book]
Date: October 7th, 2004 10:22 PM
Subject: No Subject

Message:
heya hotstuff.. i'm celebrating my newfound freedom and singleness by telling you that if you were here right now, i'd eat it.


Kris, the funniest/sexiest rhinosaur i know

"RIMMY THE RHINOSORE HERE TO TELL YOU TO EAT PLENTY OF VITAMINS AND ALWAYS HAVE A BANANA IN YOUR POCKET JUST IN CASE YOU GET THE URGE!"
I don't think anything/anyone can ever make me laugh harder than Kris

"RIMMY THE RHINOSAUR SUGGESTS MIDOL IF YOU ARE BLOATED WITH CRAMPS! VAGINAL ITCHING GOT YOU DOWN???? OH GOD I JUST SAID THE V WORD JEEZUS CHRIST THAT IS SO GROSS!!!!"

Kris: im not doing anything tonight, but the last time i "hung out" the preschool teacher called the police, so i dont think thats a good idea.


Kris: your dads not gonna like put me in a figure four camel toe cheeselock is he?


Kris: *whistle* illegal homosexual hobbit on the field, 10 yard penalty 6th down

"thanks. i try to be as creative as possible when it comes my penis. like when i masturbate theres always an eggbeater or an easy bake oven involved."

i love you too petey....oh wai....jessi!

"hahah jeri curl! nigga comes walking into the locker room with no shoes on and everyone goes "look its george clinton! wait, THATS JUST THAT NIGGAS HAIRY FEET!"

me: dude i am attracted to tom brokaw LOL like seriously...... *cricket*
kris: you are fucking sick. thats just so wrong. his wrinkled ass body all sweaty rubbing up against your young tight body. *pops boner* heheh nah just joking thats some sick shit.i can just see you getting gangbanged by the kaw, richard gere, dich cheney and paul newman. *pops bigger boner*

kris: damn
kris: the lights got a lil bit dimmer
kris: when you said that
kris: the spirit of barry white is channeling thru you

Jex: you're sp pretty
kris: pretty?
Jex: yes
kris: ok
kris: i guess
kris: must be my lipstick

kris: "this pencil distributed by the milky way co."
Jex: a whole new meaning to #2 pencils

kris: u dioe tgus cines iyt te wat u wabt ti ===ut xyz un bit kiijubg zg gbgd key borad
kris: DAMN
Jex: fgittobiishing!!
kris: i was trying to say "i hope this comes out right cuz im not looking at the keyobard

kris: YOUR SO ADORABLE
kris: i jus wanna......
kris: pinch your cheeks
kris: and.....
kris: stick my dick in your face

kris: *arnold voice* NOOOOOO!!!!!!! YO HEAD IS GONNA KNOCK DOWN DA MONITAH
kris: WAKE UP YOU GIRLIE MAN!!!!!!
kris: NO!!!!!!!! DO NOT GIVE DO THE SELF-FELLATIO
kris: AWNULD DOES NOT WANNA SEE SELF FELLATIO!!!!!!!!!!

kris: yeah i like my bitches like i like my cold muggy swamps
kris: green and clammy

kris: HI MY NAME IS KRIS AND THIS IS MY COCKTEASE NAMED JESSI

Jex: and my insides are just going nuts
kris: good
kris: cuz my inside are going clits!
kris: lets get together

"HEY! WHO SAYS THE QUADRUPLE THREE KNUCKLE BYPASS CHEESELOCK ISNT A WRESTLING MOVE!"

HI I GOT A DELIVERY OF POLISH HOT LINKS HERE, I WAS JUST WONDERING IF YOU WANT ME TO DELIVER IN COLON OR KALAMAZOO!!!


Jexxi Falls asleep on the phone with Brando, Hilarity Ensues:
Bran [12:17 PM]: That phone conversation we had last night is rated as one of the funniest moments of my life
Moi [12:17 PM]: really??
Bran [12:17 PM]: I've never laughed so deep from the soul like that before
Moi [12:18 PM]: LOL what did i say
Bran [12:18 PM]: "Are you opening presents?!? ?Oh I thought it was Christmas time .."
Moi [12:18 PM]: HAHAHAHA
Bran [12:18 PM]: "Damn I was picturing polar bears in my head and I thought it was Christmas"
Moi [12:18 PM]: I swear to god I thought it was, I remember that vaguely
Bran [12:18 PM]: "mm .. waffle fries"
Moi [12:19 PM]: WTF?
Moi [12:19 PM]: i don't remember that
Bran [12:19 PM]: LOL
Bran [12:19 PM]: Yeah dude
Bran [12:19 PM]: You went on for a good bit about waffle fries
Moi [12:20 PM]: hahah are you serious?
Bran [12:20 PM]: And then you dozed off on the phone for like 5 minutes then woke up and were all like "Yeah, hamburgers and hotdogs..." and I said "Uh .. you were talking about waffle fries, love"
Bran [12:20 PM]: And you "Oh yah that's what I meant"
Moi [12:20 PM]: HAAAAAHAHAHAH ARE YOU SERIOSU?!?
Bran [12:20 PM]: Yes !
Bran [12:20 PM]: lol
Moi [12:20 PM]: i bet you were dying
Bran [12:20 PM]: Very much so
Bran [12:21 PM]: I still can't believe it
Bran [12:22 PM]: "Are you opening presents ?!"
Moi [12:22 PM]: hahahahah
Moi [12:22 PM]: i swear i don't know what the fuck i was talking about
Bran [12:22 PM]: LoL .. you were significantly gooooone
Moi [12:22 PM]: "i was picturing polar bears"
Bran [12:22 PM]: "Damn polar bears"
Bran [12:23 PM]: And I wish to god I knew how the hell waffle fries got in there
Bran [12:23 PM]: lol
Moi [12:23 PM]: hahahaha
Moi [12:23 PM]: what the fuck
Bran [12:23 PM]: lol
Bran [12:23 PM]: You tell me






What attracts you? - (101 Votes)

eyes - 52 (51%)
ass - 24 (23%)
hair - 11 (10%)
lips - 9 (8%)
teeth - 5 (4%)

Crushes
Lords of Acid - Pretty In Kink